Healthy Family Characteristics


God could not be everywhere, so he made mothers.

-Jewish Proverb

Clear Communication-

Family members are able to both listen and share negative and positive feelings with each other. Healthy families are able to settle disputes without including a third party. They are also able to recognize turn-off words, and put-down phrases that can be insulting. Be honest, direct and use person to person communication.

Cohesion-

Members of the family should feel close to each other, but respect privacy and allow freedom to act independantly. In healthy families, members are supported for who they are rather than what they look like, do, or have.

Capacity to Change-

It is important to allow change. For example, when a child becomes an adolescent, the family makes adjustments to prepare the teenager to gradually take on more responsibilities in order to prepare for separation. Capacity to change, is encouraged when there is a clear structure at home. If a household is chaotic, capacity to change is discouraged.

Clear Structure-

Healthy families have clear patterns of parents being in charge of the family. The best thing for a husband and wife to do for their child is love each other.

Understanding Roles-

Correct sibling order is demonstrated in healthy families by having clear job/chore descriptions. Children should be allowed to be children and not grow up too soon by assuming the responsibilities that belong to the parent. Everyone should contribute to the family.

Coping with Stress-

It is good to be involved, but too many extra activities can cause stress. Learn to say "no" and prioritize. Healthy families need to find an activity that everyone enjoys. There needs to be balance so that family time can take place, but each individual can set aside time for their own hobbies.